WWF Superstars, Mar. 8, 1997WWF Superstars, Mar. 8, 1997WRESTLEMANIA REPORT
(Todd Pettingill is in the WrestleMania IV event center. He's wearing his black leather trenchcoat and his hair is slicked back.)
Todd: Wrestling fans... you have just 22 days... until the Giant becomes the WWF champion over Big Daddy Fool... ! Diesel is FINISHED! And so is the Road Warriors! We'll all see them thrown 30' down off of a scaffold and the Harlem Heat will retain their Unified Tag Team Titles! Let's also remember that Stone Cold Steve Austin will team with... Brian Pillman, making his return to the wrestling ring for the first time since his tragic accident! Brian Pillman is so courageous! Not like that quitter Shawn Michaels! Brian has stuck it out for over a year, and now is ready to compete again!
(The screen shows the Hart Foundation on one side of the screen, and Stone Cold and Pillman on the other.)
Todd: Why even BOTHER showing that graphic? We only want WINNERS up there! Fix THAT!
(The graphic slides over slightly, pushing the Hart's off. Todd's face comes up where the graphic moved from.)
Todd: That's better! Hey! Why not just put up the graphic for the Empire!? We rule this federation anyway! And flash up that 800 number also. We don't need the money... we just sell stuff because we can!
(A still photo of the Empire comes up on the screen with 1-800- Empire flashing along the bottom. Then suddenly, there is a crash... and a yelp.... the graphic blinks off... and Bam Bam Bigelow is there!!!)
Bam Bam: (holding Todd by the collar) Todd... you said you'd still do yer job objectiv'ly. Well THIS don't sound objective.
Todd: I-I-- I just say what I believe! Freedom of speech! I'm not afraid. Why are YOU so afraid?
Bam Bam: (pushes Todd back a little) Todd, you little buck-toothed rodent, get your scrawny butt outta the Event Center. You ain't doin' this job no more!!!
Todd: WHAT!? You can't do that!
Bam Bam: I can do what I want to. I'm the Vice President... and YOU AIN'T!
Todd: Yeah, you won't wrestle the Giant! You're AFRAID! Just like Shawn Michaels was... AFRAID! SCARED! A QUITTER! Bam Bam, you'll pay for this! I promise you that! Is it cool in here... or is it just ME!?
(Todd storms out. Bam Bam just chuckles at him.)
Bam Bam: Folks, I'm sorry about this. You deserve better then that. On Raw, we'll have someone else doing the pay-per-view reports from now on. Somebody that will give you the news, not a bunch of lies and crap. In the meantime, go check out the official WrestleMania IV website. It's always being updated with lots a'new stuff. Alright.. let's go to this footage. Before we went on the air, Jim Ross had a chance to talk to the Prince of Power, VADER! Roll the tape!
VADER PRE-RECORDED INTERVIEW
(Jim Ross is in the ring)
JR: Ladies and Gentlemen, would you please welcome Jim Cornette and VADER!!
(VADER's music begins to play, and VADER and Cornette enter the ring)
JR: Welcome Mr. Cornette.
Jim: You can welcome me all you want Jim Ross, but you forget that the big man is here also!
JR: Sorry, welcome to you to VADER.
Jim: That's better, because you know that VADER and myself have not been getting proper treatment in the WWF! I come into the WWF and offer my services to one Diesel and he throws me aside, rather taking advice from a reject from Japan. Then the Bruce Lee wanna be comes down to the ring and cuts off my tie!! As far as I'm concerned, you two have already dug your own grave...
JR: ..speaking of graves, what about the Undertaker!!
(the fans cheer)
Jim: Would you people shut up! Yeah, the Undertaker. Your a big man when you have people to back you up! Like what happened at the Royal Rumble. He is looking for a beating, and it will be coming from the man called VADER. But what puzzles me is that he seems to have forgotten about VADER lately, and for what?? Lady Tyr! He claims he's so busy with the nWo, yet they havn't done nothing since the Rumble! What's wrong Taker? You get over your head, and you start making excuses! This guy can't even handle a woman, let alone VADER.
VADER: DEAD MAN!! You and me will meet in the ring...at WRESTLEMANIA!!! A casket match will be...YOUR FATE!!!
Jim: Just remember Undertaker, VADER is the next WWF champion and your nothing more then a dead man. Accept out challenge and your Wrestlemania will be nothing more then a funeral. Rest in peace Undertaker!