RESULTS: Monday Night Raw Mar. 24, 1997

The World Wrestling Federation.... for over THREE years, the symbol of excellence in sports entertainment.

The sound of the fans begins to build up from the other side of the curtains. The bright lights shine through, filtered out onto Jim Ross, who stands with a microphone. He looks excited.

JR: FOLKS! We're just SIX days away from WrestleMania! I'm going to keep a close eye on all the activity here tonight to keep you updated on this fast-paced and important card! You'll see it as it happens... you'll HEAR it as it happens.... you'll EXPERIENCE it as it happens.... it's the last card before WrestleMania... it's MONDAY NIGHT RAW!!!!

(Monday Night Raw Theme Plays.)

The camera zips across the Sports Coliseum in Los Angeles....it's a sell-out crowd... but it sounds like they've packed TWICE the amount of people in the arena! It's DEAFENING!!! The Publican Mike Rotundo... Brian Pillman and Heart Attack are down at the broadcast position...... then....

The King's music begins to play, and Jerry Lawler walks out to the announce table, pointing and laughing at the fans.

Pillman: Alright! WELCOME to Monday Night Raw... and in a second... we'll be welcoming...THE KING, JERRY LAWLER! Welcome King! What's on your mind?

King: I'm coming back out to supply my Kingly wisdoms to the peons out there, that's what I'm doing here! The last time I was here on Raw, the ratings went through the roof!

Pillman: Hey KING! We got the Semi-Final matches tonight for the I/C belt! I'm pulling for VADER to take it all! Sid's a cheap shot artist and doesn't deserve to HAVE a title!

King: The Vader/Sid match ought to be great! I just hope these stinking Los Angelinos can keep their GUNS in their pockets long enough to enjoy it!

Pillman: Well... HELL! The Mega Powers are a GANG! I'd LOVE it if the crowd came over the barricade and kicked their a$$es!

Heart Attack: In L.A., I wouldn't be too suprised to see it happen!

Pillman: I see Atlantra is on the card! She's taking on Von Strahden! I wonder if we'll find out for sure if Atlantra has joined the Rebirth! I mean... she's taking on one of the Dork Side members.

Heart Attack: Do you think it's TRUE? Do you think she really IS in the Rebirth?

Pillman: I guess we'll find out tonight if the Rebirth come out with her! We'll have to see!

King: And I can't wait to see . . . my buddy, Double J, as he goes against the Super Machine! Where has the Machine been?!? I figured Jimmy Hoffa would pop up sooner than he did!

Heart Attack: Well... I think he's still a member of the Suntastics.

Pillman: Hang on a second. Jim Ross is standing by. He's got something to tell us!

Jim Ross: (seen in the back.) Well guys, I have some BIG news! Tonight... right here on Monday Night Raw... I'll be interviewing a NEW tag team that's coming here to the WWF! I can't say who it is just yet... but I CAN say it's NOT the team that's been running commercials during our programs. So stay tuned! I'll have that interview a little later on.

Pillman: Alright... that's enough from you, JR. New TAG TEAM! GREAT! They're bringing in some new blood for the Heat to BURN! hahaha! Maybe it's another team from WCW, trying to bring the titles back there.

Publican: ANY team they bring in is going to CRASH and BURN! And taxes are going to be DUE!

Pillman: "Speaking of WCW, I hear from Power and Glory that ol Ahmed Johnson just won the World Heavyweight belt in the WCW. Well I guess there miracles really do happen!"

Publican: "Well he was fighting Eddie Guerrero! No competition!"

Pillman: "Guerrero does have the Froggy Splash you know! Ha-ha!"

Heart Attack: I didn't even know Ahmed Johnson WENT to WCW!

King: That's Heart Attack for you! She's so BLONDE, she thought he was still wrestling HERE!

Heart Attack: You guys pick on EVERYBODY!

Publican: Ah... Ahmed Johnson BELONGS in that league!

Heart Attack: I remember somebody ELSE that used to be in WCW... he was SENT there to WRESTLE!

Publican: I don't know WHO you're talking about!

Pillman: What are you rambling about? We're trying to have some intelligent conversation here!

Heart Attack: You won't find that anywhere around you guys.

Pillman: I KNOW! We only find YOU around us!Alright... last week we saw the Warrior and his Mega-buddies working out in that shack called Warrior University. Well... before we get to our first match... let's check in with the Enforcers... they've got something to say about that!