Fox Presents:
Live from Europahalle in Kalsruhe, Germany
April 15, 1997
Explosions rock the Europahalle in Kalsruhe, Germany! The big screens over the ring move down until they are just 30' above and they come to life with WWF logos and TNT graphics! Footage is shown from last week.... the Warrior defeating JoBo.... Demolition winning over Fatu and Savio... and Double J defeating Vader to win the I/C title belt with the Figure Four Leglock!
The camera pans down past the ring and to the table, where Sarah D. and Brian Pillman stand. Pillman is wearing an 'F' the Fox Network' T-shirt!
Pillman: WELCOME TO TUESDAY NIGHT TITANS! WE'RE IN THE EURO-PA-HALLA-LOLLA-PALOOZA-UKELELE HALL IN GERMANY....... WHERE THE HELL ARE WE?
Sarah: I'm not even going to TRY to pronounce it. I don't want to offend these people!
Pillman: Don't worry! You're already offending them! Couldn't you have popped a breath saver or something? WHEW! And what else? Oh! ONE WORD... DEODORANT! Tonight... we've got French Fry...FLASH ...! I'm all confused with all these German words... FLASH FUNK! He'll be takin' on... HAHAHAHA!!! HAAHAHA!!! Co... HAHAHAHA!!! YOU GOTTA BE KIDDIN' ME!! They left HIM out of the United States!? HAHAHAHAHAHA! COREY MAJOR!
Sarah: Enough! YOU'VE got a match tonight too!
Pillman: Just a little WARM-UP match for when I come into the Federation full time! Just a PRELIMINARY BOUT!BUT... I've got a SUPRISE for everybody just before THAT match! It's going to be AWESOME!
Sarah: We'll SEE just how PRELIMINARY IT IS!
Pillman: Well, I'm HOPIN' Jim Neidhart can LIVE UP to preliminary status for the match! So, I AGREE with you!
Sarah: I think you'll find YOU'RE the preliminary!
Pillman: Yeah... that's real good. And what about the TRIANGLE match? Uh.... who are THESE guys?
Sarah: It's Bret the Hitman Hart...Double J... and the Blizzard!
Pillman: Alright... so you got the Hitman... a TAG TEAM WRESTLER! BIG DEAL! Double J... an ACTOR! He's leavin' on June FIRST! And Blizzard... when does HE win matches?!
Sarah: Well, you're right about THAT one!
Pillman: What the HELL is THAT the MAIN EVENT for? We have so many OTHER singles wrestlers. Jarrett's a LAME DUCK like Bill Clinton. A tag teamer... and somebody that don''t even WIN MATCHES! AND THAT'S our Main Event here in Erolophlahalelaham.... GERMANY! Wherever the hell THAT is!
Sarah: I'm not even...
Pillman: You say this town back in the USA and they say GOD BLESS YOU!
Sarah: Not to YOU, I'm SURE!
Pillman: What's YOU problem!? Oh I KNOW! There's only a few people for you to ass-kiss tonight! C'mon... kiss Flash Funk's ASS! (makes a kissy noise!)
Sarah: He's a FINE wrestler!
Pillman: What about Brian Pillman!?
Sarah: YOU'RE a good wrestler!
Pillman: I just heard you say I was PRELIMINARY! Uh-HUH!
Sarah: That's because you were calling the ANVIL preliminary!
Pillman: So you kiss HIS ass, too! We should put HIM with the Blizzard! Neither one of them can win matches on their own! We'll make it No timelimit... no DQ.. one of them HAS to win! (pauses) Are we ready to get started?
Sarah: YES!
Pillman: Well... standing by is... HAHAHA!! I can't get OVER this! Take it Sarah... HAHAHAH!
Sarah: Let's go now... to Corey Major!
