WWF Superstars, May 10, 1997WWF Superstars, May 10, 1997PHOENIX
(The Phoenix is surrounded by his fellow members as the Blizzard lays down on a fancy couch. The Phoenix flexes his fingers and removes the bandages from Blizzard's leg.)
Phoenix: You were wise to come to me...fear not...you shall be healed enough to fight.
Blizzard: I trust you...who else do I have to trust?
Phoenix: Now there will be some pain, but I am healing the muscles to where they were intended to be, understand?
Blizzard: If it gets me in action sooner, I'll try anything!
Phoenix: Very well...
The Phoenix feels around on Blizzard leg and nods.
Phoenix: Yes...I could understand how modern medicine could see this as carrer-ending...let the medicine of the ancient orients aid you.
A Rebirth member hands some ointment to Phoenix. Phoenix puts it on his hands and rubs it in his hands. Phoenix lays his hands on Blizzard's knee and piches it and rubs it. Blizzard's face is in great pain.
Phoenix: Dear me...it even got to the bone...this may be harder than I thought...
Phoenix puts more ointment on Blizzard's knee and rubs it even harder. Blizzard groans in pain and finally cracks.
Blizzard: Are you SURE you know what you're doing?!?!?!
Phoenix: Trust me, Mr. Blades.
Phoenix rubs the knee even more. Blizzard is on the verge of screaming in pain. Phoenix then makes one final squash and a loud *POP* is heard. Blizzard let's out a yell.
Blizzard: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU...wait a minute...
Blizzard moves his knee a little bit and gapes at it in astonishment. Phoenix holds Blizzard's leg.
Phoenix: Don't let it move for an hour. Stay here and rest.
Blizzard: I...I don't even feel the cramp!
Phoenix: You should keep that knee patched. It should heal in about a week now that all of the muscle is in correct placing.
Blizzard: How can I thank you?!?!
Phoenix: Merely join us! You could use a helping hand getting back to the WWF.
Blizzard: I can think of better...after Sunny betrayed you and me, why don't we go after her little stable after she gets her little feet of the ground?
Phoenix: A grand idea! Welcome to the Rebirth, Blizzard.
BRIAN PILLMAN
Pillman gets into the ring with a mic and his crutch. He's wearing a t-shirt that reads: "Tripwire Rocks!"
Pillman: Well, look here. Just this past Tuesday, I am taking on the role of Ambassador of Goodwill north of the border.... relaying to all the Canadian fools just how great America is. I boasted of your fighting spirit and your integrity and congeniality. But was I ever WRONG!!! (fans boo loudly) You people SUCK! We should deport you all to some third world country and let them teach you a thing or two about CLASS!
Pillman laughs evily at the fans and ducks under a medium soft drink that's thrown at him.
Pillman: Right now... I'm going to interview a man that can teach you a LOT about ANYTHING you want to know! And I'm not talking about Bobby Heenan... or Dean Douglas. I'm talking about a man that IS the fighting spirit of America. A man that children the WORLD OVER should look up to and respect. I'm talking about.... STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!!!
There is the sound of glass breaking, then Stone Cold's music starts to play. He blasts through the curtains, making no other actions, but to walk to the ring. He gets inbetween the ropes, then jumps up in the corner on the second rope... and just SPITS out into the audience before climbing back down. Pillman doubles over with laughter.
Pillman: Steve! Welcome! Now I'm sure you heard the comments from the Blizzard Adrien Blades. He suddenly thinks that YOU challenged HIM!
Austin: That just goes to show how STUPID he is. I went and done knocked him so hard in the head, the frostbitten fairy went and cried to Phoenix that his LEG hurt him! The boy's got no sense. He ain't foolin' NOBODY with his idle little threats toward that siliconed filled NAPKIN Sunny! She's sittin' on everybody's lap... and he's nothin' but a 7'2" whinin' piece of trash that can't beat nobody no-how.
Pillman: Not once the headlock is in place! Steve... maybe we should explain it to them. Tell them all about their little plot.
Austin: Y'see... Stone Cold... and Brian F'N Pillman... we don't need no little plots or bedtime stories to get the job done. I told everybody that I would beat the HELL out of Derrick Stardom... and tha'ts exactly what I did. The Blizzard and Sunny went and done had their little Mickey Mouse break-up and they're tryin' to fix it so it looks all permanent. But Brian Pillman is the BEST damn announcer in the WWF... and he knows it ain't what it seems.
Pillman: Blizzard and Sunny IN the Rebirth to go after the BLACKJACKS! Read my page and you'll find out how I KNOW!
Austin: The bottom line IS... Blizzard... shut your hole now, and I won't kick your ass the second you come back to the WWF, son. Now, up next.... is Bret Hart. Hitman... you may think that you're real smart... gettin' yourself beat by Sting so you won't have to face Stone Cold at the King of the Ring. I got half a mind to go back in the dressing room right now and CROWN you like you WAS the king with my FIST upside your FAT HEAD.
Pillman: But Steve... YOU'RE still in the King of the Ring! You're going to be facing... FLASH FUNK! Are you scared?
Austin: No I ain't scared! At the Royal Rumble, I threw his sorry behind out of the ring, then I tossed out Mr. Perfect and won the Royal Rumble. He comes down in his hat and has his little dance steps and his bimbettes with him, but when he gets inside the squared circle, he don't know his ass from a hole in the ground! I'm gonna beat the livin' HELL out of Flash Funk... BECAUSE I WANT TO!!!
Pillman: Steve... any other words? For anybody?
Austin: Mr. Perfect. Bret Hart won't be gettin' the job done anytime soon for your little 'favors' that you're givin' each other. If you think you're so PERFECT, why not step your ass into the ring with Stone Cold Steve Austin, and I'll SHOW you what a perfect ASS-WHOOPIN' is, son! The whole world knows I had your ass beat at the Survivor Series. I kicked your teeth down your throat at the Royal Rumble... and I'm gonna do it again!
Pillman: Why's that Steve?
Austin: BECAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO!